Black dudla dad wants fathers to know the birth and postpartum journey belongs to them too

OMAHA, Neb. — When we think about doulas, we often think about the support mothers receive before, during and after childbirth. But one man is changing the conversation, making sure fathers know they have a role in the birthing process, too.

Five years ago, Juan Irby became the first Black Doula in Alabama. His journey into birth work started with something deeply personal.

"It started with the birth of my son. I ended up going through post-partum depression, and I didn't have the support that I need at the time," Irby said.
Now, through his organization Dad to Dudla, Irby is making sure other fathers have the tools to support their partners, care for their babies and take care of themselves.

"You have all the power to do whatever you need to do to make sure that your partner come home safe," Irby said.

At a recent community conversation hosted by I be black girl, dads learned how to advocate during pregnancy, support their partners through labor and navigate fatherhood. And yes, that includes a little laundry and diaper duty.

"We can fold the laundry. We can wash the dishes. We can do this too," Irby said.

But Irby says there's another conversation that can't be ignored: dads' mental health. He believes postpartum depression among fathers may be unrecognized because men are often taught to keep their feelings to themselves. "Dads, you need a community too," Irby said.

For dads like Johnny Nesbit, the conversation was an eye-opener.
"I think I would want the power to choose to have a doula to go through the process with us. I know it's something that my wife would definitely prefer to do as well," Nesbit said.

Irby says you don't have to be perfect. You just have to be present — and remember that taking care of yourself is part of taking care of your family.
"Dads are the heartbeat of the whole entire operation. Like, we want to be seen. We want to be heard about the whole entire process," Irby said.

For information on how to be a duola dad visit Dad to dudla.

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